Embracing Resilience: Key Takeaways from My Interview on 'Your Future Starts Now'

I had the incredible opportunity to chat with Gia Lacqua on her amazing podcast, "Your Future Starts Now." If you haven't listened to it yet, you should! Gia's energy and passion for empowering women is infectious, and our conversation was a deep dive into resilience, trauma recovery, and the strength it takes to rebuild a marriage affected by childhood trauma.

My Journey to Resilience

Sharing my story was both vulnerable and empowering. Twelve years ago, I married my dream guy on a beautiful beach in Hawaii. It was a second marriage for both of us, blending our families and dreams. But soon after, I began noticing behaviors in my husband that were confusing and caused conflict. His need for control and significant withdrawal during conflicts were unlike anything I had encountered before. Despite trying every piece of relationship advice out there, nothing seemed to work.

It was only when my husband disclosed his history of childhood abuse that things started to make sense. This revelation was the beginning of our journey into trauma recovery, a process far more extensive and challenging than I had ever imagined.  LISTEN HERE

Understanding Trauma Responses

One key takeaway from our conversation was understanding trauma responses. Trauma survivors often develop coping mechanisms in childhood that, while necessary for survival then, become problematic in adult relationships. Behaviors such as an obsessive need for control or significant withdrawal are not personal attacks but ingrained responses to past trauma. Recognizing this difference is crucial for spouses navigating these complex dynamics.

The Power of Persistence and Patience

Trauma recovery isn't a straight path. It's filled with ups and downs, making persistence and patience essential. Small, consistent efforts can lead to significant progress over time. For example, when conflicts arise, my approach to calming the situation starts with something counterintuitive: not engaging immediately. By not trying to fix the problem right away, you allow space for the trauma response to subside, preventing things from getting worse.

Seeking Support and Setting Boundaries

Navigating a partner’s trauma can feel isolating, but it’s essential to seek support. This doesn't mean sharing every detail but finding trusted individuals or professionals who can offer the support you need. Open communication with your partner about the necessity of external support can help set boundaries that respect their privacy while ensuring you get the help you need.

Self-Care is Non-Negotiable

As women, we often put others' needs before our own, but self-care is non-negotiable. It doesn’t require grand gestures; small daily practices that restore your energy and strength are crucial. By taking care of yourself, you’re better equipped to handle the challenges of supporting a partner through trauma recovery.

Embracing Change and Creativity

Finally, one of the most powerful messages from our discussion was the importance of embracing change and creativity. What worked to get you through the initial stages of a relationship may not be what’s needed to navigate trauma recovery. Be open to new techniques and adapt to what works best for your unique situation.

Conclusion

Our conversation on "Your Future Starts Now" was a testament to the power of resilience, understanding, and unwavering support in the face of adversity. I hope our discussion inspires you to explore your own paths of healing and growth. For those navigating similar challenges, remember that while the journey is tough, it is also transformative.

If you’d like to learn more about my journey or need support, the Free Resources & Products page.  There, you’ll find free resources, my blog, and the opportunity to schedule a call with me. Let’s continue this journey together, fostering resilience and thriving in our relationships.

Don't miss the full interview on 'Your Future Starts Now' and join the movement towards rewriting the rules of success for high-achieving women. Your future truly starts now.